Friday, March 26, 2010

So You Don't Have a Boyfriend, Why Not Ask a Guy Out?

Over my Spring Break, I was asked that question. I really did not know what to say except "it's not in me to just walk up to a guy and ask him out." I guess you can call me crazy, but I have always dreamed of a man pursuing me, not the other way around. Being single, I find myself always being asked "do you have a boyfriend,?""when will you get a boyfriend?" or "Asia, you need to get out there and make yourself known." Sometimes when people approach me with these questions, I don't know what to say or how to act. We live in a culture that believes that you have to "date" a lot to find the right person.  Sometimes, I wonder what people think of me being 21 and having not been on dates. I use to wonder if I should change my personality maybe, I will get more attention from guys. I believe that there is a time and a season for everything (Ecclesiastes 3:1-5). In this time, I am using my single years wisely, building my relationship with Him, and praying and seeking Him. Everybody is searching for love and it is usually in the wrong places. They find themselves not satisfy. I know who my first Love is and He completely satisfies me. I want to guard my heart and emotions. I don't know when or if a guy will every be interested in pursing me and one day to get married. But, I do know that if God, has someone for me it will happen on His terms and His timing. I don't need to rush into a relationship or date a lot of guys to know if "he is the one." I believe in God's sovereignty, He will lead the person He has for into my life. Until then, I am just waiting, praying and trusting Him about the man He might have for me.


Glo said...

"I use to wonder if I should change my personality maybe, I will get more attention from guys."

No, you shouldn't. Trust someone who spent a good bit of her adult life, even as a Christian, trying to figure out how to make guys find me interesting. It's not worth it girl. Start compromising with your personality and it will be easier to do compromising in other areas.

In due time, due time.


Meredith Ivy said...

This is so good, Asia, and as you know from my story, the Lord WILL bring your man into your life in His timing and that man will be better than you imagined! Keep trusting the Lord~~ He is so faithful!

Asia said...

Thanks for the encouraging me Gloria and Meredith

Misstarii said...

I would say take your time...take all the time you need and its good like you said getting to know God more and yourself.
You don't need to change your personality, believe me you will get a man who loves you just the way you are.

Elspeth said...

It sounds to me like your head is in the right place. I agree with you that you shouldn't be the pursuer of a relationship.

Your heart is hidden in God, and when the time is right, He will send the man He has for you.

Ashleigh said...

Hi Asia! I just found your blog! I get that question all of the time! I usually respond with, "I don't date. I'm saving my heart for the one that the Lord has for me if it's His will for me to marry!" Then they usually ask, "But how are you ever going to get married if you don't date?!"

Most people believe that they must "try out" potential suiters to find that special someone, which is obviously not true! Just look at Meredith's story!:)

Anway, I greatly admire you for letting God plan out your love story!

God bless,

Marie said...

Hello Asia, I loved reading this entry in your blog. I don't know if you remember me. I think you commented on one of my blogs in the past -- . I am the mother of 5 grown children, and they all felt the same way you do. Good for you, saving yourself for God's purposes and waiting on Him to bring the right man into your life at the right time!! He is faithful, and He will reward you for your commitment to Him! My youngest daughter is 27, and had not dated until last summer when she and a friend from several years earlier started 'seeing' each other. They just set the date for a wedding in August. She did everything right, and now -- just like I told her -- she has found that he was worth waiting for! My other children are married, and they all waited, too. they didn't feel that the dating game was necessary, and it obviously wasn't.
Here is a quote that I read several months ago. It goes right along with what you said: "A woman should be so lost in God, that a man has to seek HIM to find her". God bless you, Asia! With love in Him, Marie.

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